Friday, December 9, 2011

Golfing Together

I was discussing common friends with Tom, a new out-of-town friend. I mentioned Ann and he said, “Yes, I played golf with her husband Mason this afternoon.” 

I said, “Great!”

A few days later, I received an email from Ann telling me that Mason had collapsed on the golf course, was transported to the hospital where it was determined that he had become dehydrated in the 3-digit heat. Anybody could become dehydrated in those temperatures. He was doing well now, but she had experienced a hectic couple of days.

Mason had collapsed on the same day that Tom said that they had golfed  together. How does a man golf with someone who collapses and fail to mention that? I analyzed this for about a week and consulted with other friends to determine the answer.

Later, I asked Tom why he didn’t mention Mason’s collapse. He said, “Well, I didn’t know that he had collapsed. I knew that they had taken him off in an ambulance, but I didn’t know why. Somebody said that it might be his blood pressure.”

I thought, ‘Really? You were golfing with someone and didn’t know they had collapsed? Even knowing an ambulance was called would not escape the details of a woman relating the same information. No woman would have failed to mention this.’ We are so different, we women and men. 

My analysis finally reached a conclusion. They weren’t really playing golf together. They just happened to be playing in the same tournament on different teams, who apparently weren’t very close to each other. 

Apparently, if a male tournament player collapses or dies on the golf course, all of the other men simply calculate in their minds whether the incapacity of the player has resulted in the increase or decrease of their team’s tournament ranking. At the nineteenth hole over a beer or two, they might even contemplate the identity of the lucky man  who remarries the guy’s wife if he dies.

If the same scenario had happened among women, friends would be notified, plans would be made and casseroles would begin cooking. The casseroles are for family meals. Women would be offering to baby-sit, take the kids to school, along with an entire plethora of other duties for which we women are responsible. The prayer chain would be initiated before the ambulance arrived.

Well, you get the point. I am glad that someone took time out of their tournament to call an ambulance for Mason. I am glad that Mason recovered so quickly that he was back on the golf course a week later. And now I know if a man says that they golfed with someone, to always ask more questions.

copyright 2011 by Kathy Robbins

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